14 Reasons for my low self-esteem

So my face is starting to resemble the rugged, weathered look of Paul Hogan.  It is enough to drive me to distraction.  Really. Distraction. While I am driving.  The rear-view mirror has a way of highlighting my rough, freckled forehead.  It's awesome.

Did you know that I don't have any comfortable jeans?  Well, I don't. Just the other day in the midst of a clothing crisis I vowed to lose those lingering 15 lbs of Chickie weight come hell or high water.  Speaking of high water-- most of my jeans are just a tidge too short, probably because they no longer "hang"-- they just stick. 

But don't worry, the diet didn't start immediately, which is good, because had I not gone for that late night dish of ice cream I would not have discovered that our fridge was broken. Having a broken fridge for five days sounds like a great diet-- but it's not because you find yourself trying to eat everything before it spoils. So the diet starts Monday, after the new fridge is finally delivered.

The morning after the fridge mishap John asked me if the sink was also broken.  I told him it wasn't and he explained that because there were no dishes in the sink he thought something must be wrong.  Really? Do I leave dishes in the sink that often?

So after the unforeseen expense of the week and after watching some crazy couponing show on TLC, I decided that I needed to start using coupons in order to save a little cash. I was actually contemplating coupons while I was in line at Super Target.  The checker (you know the one with the obscenely large cleft chin) was sooo slow and the woman in front of me had about $500 worth of groceries. After he completed her sale, she handed him a coupon for a free loaf of bread that she had forgotten to give him. By this time there were about five people behind me and I realized why sometimes you should just pay for the freaking loaf of bread. You might think the setting for this story should have been Wal Mart, but that just goes to show that the recession has affected everyone.

I'll be honest, I considered advertising this post on facebook just so someone would comment and make me feel interesting. I still might do it.  I have TONS of friends on facebook and they all find me interesting.

Because I now have baby blog

My friend Korie gave me the idea to chronicle Emily's growth by taking a picture with the same object every month. Can you tell which on is the real baby?



Two months

Are you sick of the flower yet?  I have a million other bows but this is the one that is always nearby and it always matches. Plus, I've never been too girlie-- this is as good as it gets.

Rambling thoughts from the middle of the night

A new post for the blog was working itself out in my brain during one of Chickie's midnight meals.  The post would be brilliant, it would explain the sheep herding documentary John and I watched the other day. I would go into great detail about how the herder dressed a new lamb in what seemed to be a little outfit we both assumed was to keep the baby warm.  It was so cute.  Then I would go on to recount how the little "outfit" was actually the skin of a still-born lamb and it was placed on this lamb so the mother of the dead baby would think the impostor lamb was hers.  My story would conclude with a very real statement that I finally understood the history behind the expression, "a wolf in sheep's clothing".  The end.

But then I got distracted thinking about all the fascinating, useless facts I could share. I get these facts mostly from stories on NPR and more times than not, I end up having a "driveway moment" at my destination. 

I could include the ultra interesting history of overalls, especially the striped one's worn by rail workers (so as to be seen by the trains, duh). 

Everyone would be asking for more about the story I heard about redesigning the toothbrush and the fact that there are about five different grips people use to brush their teeth (the majority of women use the "death grip").

And did you know there's a person whose job it is to engineer the sounds our electronic devices make?  You know-- the beep of pushing a button on your phone, the click of your iPod, the turn signal in your car.  Getting just the right tone is a rigorous process, believe me.

And did you know the banjo was invented by Southern slaves and that it was based on instruments they knew from West Africa? If you're interested in learning more just ask, I wrote a paper on it.

I also wrote a paper about how various cultures divide color.  Some people refer to all colors as either black or white.  Then the next color to be distinguished from all the rest is always red. Fascinating! I should be on NPR.

It all sounded good in the middle of the night.

By the way, Kitty turned 6 last week.